Mama McFee Says “No”

IMG_0562How ironic.  Over the years I have so often been told that I need to learn how to say “no”.  Yes, I am one of those.  One of those that so quickly jumps in to a project, sometimes without asking the right questions.  The one that says “yes” when no one else will.  Not necessarily a “yes woman”…oh wait!  “YES” I am.

So who would have ever thought I just had to have a toddler to learn how to not only say, but shout, sing, and repeat that one little word more times than I can count in a day.

Oh yes, we have now crossed into 19 months, and I see the visions of terrible two’s lurking on our doorstep.  “No” has not only become a constant in my vocabulary, but my darling #weeMcFee has made it a favorite word, as so many parents predicted she would.  I laugh at how everything is “no”, even when we know she means “yes”.  How ironic that we all start out as “no people” and some of us make that 180 degree shift.

But I find that learning to say “no” to my little Ellie-Bean has taught me a lot about the power of that one little word.  While it doesn’t always work on her, I have learned more and more to say “no” because of her.  Whether it is no to a late night call, or no to work travel – motherhood has given me the strength to do what so many mentors thought I could never learn…to just say no!

So many elements of motherhood are powerful.  The bond, the most amazing love you have ever felt, the most amazing worry and the most amazing joy.  But the empowerment I have been given by this little human to finally put my family first above all else.  To weigh everything according to her happiness and her father’s.  To push back without fear.  It’s the most amazing feeling on earth.

So tonight, as I am two days into my forty-first year, listening to my sweet baby say “no Mama” into the monitor as she fights sleep, I celebrate the strength she has given me.  I celebrate embracing my life.  Stopping to smell the flowers, to take a walk to the market and to share a bedtime story.

As the song says “this is my fight song, take back my life song”…so don’t be surprised if you hear me say “NO”!  Especially if you throw your cup on the floor.  LOL!

Happy Musing!

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