Someone needs to pinch me. There are still days that I cannot believe all of this is happening, that I am now 19 weeks pregnant and carrying a healthy baby girl. I count my blessings every day; say my prayers every night; and try to remember just how lucky I am.
At 19 weeks, I am really excited with my progress. So far I have gained about eight pounds (there’s a ninth one that hasn’t quite hung on yet), am feeling great throughout the day, able to walk about 1.5 miles each afternoon, and am eating like the food is going to run away. I am still not having particular cravings; I pretty much just want food all day long. I know little one is growing, as is my belly, but this hunger is something else.
I try to keep healthy options in the house such as fruit, veggies, hummus, etc. But if I have had a craving it would be potato chips. As with much of my pregnancy, salt has been my go to, which is very different than my pre-pregnancy cravings that would have included anything sweet. I buy as much all natural, organic and veggie chip/snack options as I can. But I know I’m only fooling myself – chips are still chips whether they are made with organic potatoes and sea salt or not. But at the end of the day, they are just yummy and now I’m craving some.
This month has been both exciting and nerve wracking. As a thirty-nine year old woman, more tests are run to monitor little one and her health. I know that not many women talk about this as it is a very scary and private journey. All any of us want is a healthy child. But the process has been more overwhelming than I ever imagined.
Based on my age, we already knew we were going to have a different journey than we would have had in my early thirties, but I just was not prepared for all the tests. Fortunately, my sweet husband is always so wonderful and supportive. And so as with everything we have encountered, I am trying to focus on the positive outcomes of the tests. For example, our ultrasound this week was to check for fetal abnormalities. While I admit I was my typical worrisome self, by the time we got there, had received our counseling, and were in the ultrasound room – my fears began to subside. As we once again saw those beautiful images of little one, they were completely gone.
We had already decided we wanted to know what little one was (I’m a planner), but when the moment struck and we heard the words, my heart became overwhelmed. It is a girl; we are having a daughter; she is healthy and quite a bouncy little thing. While I have been feeling and connecting with our child from the beginning, now knowing what she is and calling her by her name, makes her even more real. Hearing my husband talk about her, and say “daddy’s little girl”, brings tears to my eyes. It’s not because of wanting a particular gender – but just the reality of knowing, dreaming, and planning.
As many of the comments on social media announced, we are now going to live in a “pink paradise”. Her mother is already a pink-aholic, and now, I’ll have to try to contain myself with all of the temptations around me. All I know is that with twenty-one weeks left, it’s time to start planning, buying and preparing. The McFee’s are having a girl; our lives will never be the same; and we absolutely cannot wait!